Miss A 2010 - Blythe Marabelle Melody

I didn't have a chance to post anything for a while. I was busy with so many things and was thinking about new projects that I want to do (my new blog project). Lately I think quite a lot about each of my online page. I have start blogging and been on online social for a few years. I didn't think much about differentiate each one. Just want to try & and getting to know new platform. Now there're so many pages that I would like to keep them live, including this one. I start writing here because I want to keep things / my thoughts somewhere. But I have so many interests so it's quite funny when post about doll is after post about web development sort of things. :-)

Since I'm in between the process, you have to live with my mess for a while then. Just like today.. It's about to be a doll post again!!!

The promo picture of Blythe - Miss A 2010 is now released. It's a must to share here too! She is "Marabelle Melody".

Cute, huh? Faburous eye colors.. That's what I think!

Pullips Mellissa and Limitted Gyro

Pre order for August from Bambino! (a doll shop in Bangkok) It's under "Police" them. Teayang (Gyro) is a limited edition, which it only opens for 20 pre-order. Pullips (Melissa) comes in her sexy look! Pretty, huh? However, the J-doll is not quite a catch.
What I love about Pullips is how neat their clothes are. Her charm can catch my interest a while but eventually it's not last as Blythe! Anyway, I still don't have any plan to adopt more girls to my family, nor giving up any of my girls. I'm always in my shopping mode though.

Cutie Customed Blythe

AshBeth
Originally uploaded by Olydoll

I found this girl on Flickr.com. She is the work of a doll artist in Russia. She is so cute!!! I love her look so much.
Thanks for lighten up my day, girl!

Life & Mistakes

"Life is all about making mistakes. All you havve to do is make sure you don't make the same one twice."

I found above quote was written by someone on a web site, which I forgot where it is. Sorry for not be able to share the source here. I just found the quote is warm and so kind. You would feel so great if there anyone say this to you after you screwed up on something. I think at the time that you are overwhelmed with mistakes that you did to your life, all you need is someone who will come and say nicely to you like "everything is going to be fine".

Life is never easy... The world is getting harder to live in.. More people become not so nice... All you have to do is.. find someone that is always ready to be there to say those nice little things to pull you up from darkness hours of your life!

Have a good life journey, everyone..

An easy post!

I don't post anything for a few days because I was too lazy to have a deep thought and process it into a writing piece!! What a pitiful accuse! But it's really true. So, please don't mind if I would make an easy post for today. :-)

I just want to capture a weird moment that I had during the passed weekend. I needed to go to a bank, which branches are rare. So I decided to go to a big mall near my home. I don't like shopping! Yes, I will go to mall only when it's really needed. However, I'm quite enjoyed myself this time. I happened to find a new vendor offer a new kind of spa service, the fish spa. The mechanic is so easy, you just sit there, putting your legs down in the water, to let those little fishes eat your dead skin! It sounds scary, doesn't it! Well, it't kind of a strange experience that's difficult to give a definition. Anyway, it's good to try to let other creatures eat you after you are the big eater for the rest of your life!!! Fair enough?




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International foods party

I had a party at the office yesterday. The theme is world cup foods party. It's quite fun because of the chance to taste though those exotic foods. Photos describe thousands words. Let's see...































Bon appetite, everybody!

4th of July

Yesterday was America's national day. This makes me think of 2 things; Born on the 4th of July by Oliver Stone and 4th of July - a song from Soundgarden. I don't think I really understand what Chris wants to say in the song, even I have tried to read it through many, many times. If anyone would like to share your view, don't be hesitate to send your thoughts to my email. (thesilkystar@gmail.com) I would love to hear what you think.

4th of July - Soundgarden

Shower in the dark day

Clean sparks driving down
Cool in the waterway
Where the baptized drown
Naked in the cold sun
Breathing life like fire
Thought I was the only one
But that was just a lie

Cause I heard it in the wind
And I saw it in the sky
And I thought it was the end
And I thought it was the 4th of July
Pale in the flare light
The scared light cracks & disappears
And leads the scorched ones here
And everywhere no one cares
The fire is spreading
And no one wants to speak about it
Down in the hole
Jesus tries to crack a smile
Beneath another shovel load
And I heard it in the wind
And I saw it in the sky
And I thought it was the end
And I thought it was the 4th of July
Now I'm in control
Now I'm in the fall out
Once asleep but now I stand
And I still remember
Your sweet everything
Light a Roman candle
And hold it in your hand

Cause I heard it in the wind
And I saw it in the sky
And I thought it was the end

And I thought it was the 4th of July

Hello, Dear!

 My dear friend, Pim, who are married and resides happily with her lovely husband in Holland., has sent a set photo of her first daughter this afternoon. Her name is Pluem, which means pleasure in Thai. She is the second from right on the photo, the girl who is in the pink dress. Though I'm not interested to have a child of my own, but seeing a little girl there, made me so delighted. Having a new life born in any family is a bless. It's a miracle that 2 lives, man and woman, fall in love, live together and bringing little "them" to the world as their legacy. Pim, my friend, I respect her so much as she build things around her life so well. She has been married for many years before she decided to have a child. I can see only bright things that are going to happen ahead in this warm family. I wish I would have a chance to visit this little niece in a few years.

Love you so, little girl!

Live the NOW!

Sewing Pixie is an interesting blog that I found last night, while I surfed around the web for idea for my next sewing project for my Blythe girls. It's actually not a doll clothes sewing site as I expected but it's far more interesting because the way the blogger writes about her life is so fresh and real. I went through post after post and found that she is confused with how life is treating her. She is still so young in her early 20s, lives in a big city. I think the same feeling might have happened to anyone at least once. I can feel her fear, insecure feeling that she has. It made me realize that these feelings are truth of life. Sometimes life just plays hard on us, until we get numb. Then we will be clueless with how we are going to take ourselves out of the difficult situation. I think this process is there because the nature wants to remain us that we are still alive and we need to keep our butts moving for something better. Normally, after the stage of fear and insecurity, we will eventually find a light at the end of the tunnel. And you know what, after that, when your life gets back in order again, you will find peace in yourself, which I would call it "Happiness"! And that feeling will be with us for a while until the next waves hit us again. It's so natural. You will never find happiness, if you don't ready to tackle your issues to get yourself through the hard time. If you ask if there's any chance that the happiness can be lasted, I don't know.. But it's not likely to be so. The basic natural law is there's nothing last forever. If the old doesn't die, then no new thing can be born. The end of an old happiness could lead to another bigger happiness later. Or it can be in other way around. The best way to deal with this uncertainty, is to accept the fact as the way this world is. Trying to against it will only add unnecessary pain to your life. All you need to do is enjoy the moment as we live. Feel the good, feel the bad... and grow with it. And learn to master the art of living the NOW together.

BLYTHE BOHEMIAN PEACE

BLYTHE BOHEMIAN PEACE
Originally uploaded by aniblythe

The new girl is about to come! She is Bohemian Peace.. I really like her style! Her stocks are neat. Her look is not really so unique though. I would prefer Nostalgic Pop over her. (Nicky Lad is nice too!) Anyway, my next catch (if possible) would still be my all time favorite, Gentle River, as before! Anyway, no allowance for new doll in 2010!!!

Finally, OS 4 came to safe me!

Finally... Finally... I got my iPhone OS update! And the biggest result that I'm really happy with is... after struggling have no way to take photos on my iPhone out to the computer for months, OS4 completely there as a solution from heaven. Finally, I could get my 14,000+ photos from my iPhone out to the computer. It's a real relieve to get this problem solved. 

Other exciting new things for me is now with OS 4, you can create folder and group whatever icon you want together. Another problem is solved after trying hard to keep number of applications limited to fit with screen allowance.

It seems like there are a lot to learn on this new OS. Sometimes little bit of improvement on this and that can increadibly help your life a lot easier. I love the feeling when I found that with this update, my photo can be viewed base on location where those photos were taken. Exciting, huh? It's nice to see photo from your trips aligned nicely together.

The last tip! Why don't you try double tap the home button, the screen turns translucent and slides up, allowing you to peek at the apps running “under the hood”. Lovely, isn't it?

Soundgarden - Fell On Black Days

Chris, I love you so! This sparks my soul!!

Another Heartbreak Hotel!

Let's see the same song in another version... She is cool... Love her voice.

Elvis Presley - Heartbreak Hotel

Up in the air

I'm out of the office for training. I love it so much. Spending time outside the office is one of my precious moment. The vanue of the training is in a highrise building in Bangkok. After my quick lunch, I'm here by the window to enjoy the view. This makes me miss the day that I worked at True. One of the best thing is seeing Bangkok skyline and feel sense of freedom. The view like this could make you feel like your world somehow has been lift to be in heaven level!! Don't laugh! I mean it! How come you can see across the town in one glance if you are on earth! I found my mind is calm whenever I find myself up in the air like this. It's somewhat like a spiritual ritual that I should find time to please myself few times a year.

The idea of getting away is inside all of us. What keep me wake up every morning is the hope that I make myself believe that one day, I will have enough money to buy myself my own freedom. That would come in 20 years, my retirement. Supposed human's life is about 80, I have to live that long just for enjoying the last 20 years in freedom. What about my first 60? Is it the real purpose of my life? Really?

Just a confusion when emotion is stirring!!!

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Unexpected...

Today...

Didn't go to work... But
Mum is sick...
Bathrooms were broke...
Money out without prior plan...
Feel loaded of responsibility...

Disturbing feeling is back...

I'm longing for the day that...

No responsibility...
No pressure...

there's no one else to please but myself...

It's my wish...

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Way back to 'the old me'

I need to read more! I realize this today. After 2 weeks of getting back to do daily blog, I found I lost some ability to think sharply and to translate it into writing. It must because I spend less time to really 'read' 'think' and 'write' as I did in the past. I can't afford to let go of my quality. I always believe that writing will eventually turn to be my best friend when I'm old. Besides, I might find some interesting insight that I would use it as fuel to drive my life in powerful way again.

I really miss the old me!

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Simplicity

GIVE ME THE SIMPLE LIFE
(Harry Ruby / Rube Bloom)

I don't believe in frettin' and grievin';

Why mess around with strife?
I never was cut out to step and strut out.
Give me the simple life.

Some find it pleasant dining on pheasant.
Those things roll off my knife;
Just serve me tomatoes; and mashed potatoes;
Give me the simple life.

A cottage small is all I'm after,
Not one that's spacious and wide.
A house that rings with joy and laughter
And the ones you love inside.

Some like the high road, I like the low road,
Free from the care and strife.
Sounds corny and seedy, but yes, indeed-y;
Give me the simple life.

What is you hungry for?

Human has his own needs. We are all hungry for something. Different person has different thing that keeps them comforted. Some may eat to feel secured. Some may lie to feel being accepted. Some may spend, just to proove their worthliness. Anyway, human is a complicated creature. There's no simple when you try to find what you really need. Some spend most of their lives to pursue the wrong things, just to find at the end that it's not what they want. The biggest illussion that we created to blind ourselves from seeing our own needs are mostly from the society that we live in. People can easily feel empty with all stuff that they thought they wanted are in your hands. Officially, we can declare ourselves as totally "Lost" in civilize jungle!

Find your needs, kill your inner pain and you will experience the freedom from inside. I'm not close to reach that point yet, though.

TV, what I love about you!

It happened while I was watching TV... I started thinking about what I really want from those hours that I spend watching TV each days. Do I just want to kill time? I don't want to jump into that conclusion too quickly. After considering about programs that I always watch, I think what I love about TV is, this small window allows me to see other people lives and take me across the wold to see whereever I would want to go. It helps me get off my real life for the time that I concentrate on it. There're many times that I catch some thoughts while I watch TV. Though sometimes I would feel like watching too much TV is the key reason to make me depressed and less active.

Anyway, like millions of people, I believe TV is the best thing that allows you experience the freedom that we are all dying for. The more stress you have in real life, the more you have to depend on this small window to escape from the real world. Some would warn about people should get their lives, rather than spend hours on TV each day. It sounds great and make sense, but what could people do when they have no life to get back to in this cruel world!


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Living The Fear

If I say, Today's world is the world of fear. Some of you may think I'm exaggerated about it. But the more I live my life, the more I believe in this truth. People today are living under the cover of fear that some of us are not even aware of. Have you ever worried about your future? Have you ever concerned if you would lost your job or completely lost ability to earn your income? Have you ever afraid to get serious illness one day? Have you ever been afraid of what the future will bring to your life? We all have different kind of fear in each of us and we react to it in different ways.

I remember that I have less fear when I was younger. And the kind of fear that I had then is just temporary, such as fear of not being good enough in some incident at work, which it disappeared quickly after the situation. For now, I think I have deeper fear. I'm worried about my future. Though I have a job, which pays so well but I'm still worried what if it will last somedays soon. I start to worry that I may not good enough in what I do and I wouldn't be able to find other source of income to cover what what I need to take care of. I even concern about my life after retirement, which is more than 20 years away. I found it's easy to push yourself in the world of fear when your shoulders are full of responsibility. The picture of "Unknown" things in the future for yourself is not as scary as when you aware that you may put people who rely on you in trouble with you. That's really a heart shaking scene, when you start thinking about it.

We all do have fear inside. But the most important part is how you can control it, how you would not let it eating you out. That's what I'm working on it.

Live Curious & Casual Acquaintances!

I spent my morning on adding Google Analytics code to this blog. This will help me see how many people come to my blog, what they read, where are they from, computer that they use, Internet connection that they are on... all of that info will be there for me. I reached to the point that I am so curious and really want to get to know my readers. (If any) I don't get any response so I have to rely on this trick... The easier way, if you read this post and are not too shy to say hi, please do not hesitate to say hello to me. :-)

Anyway, it's not too difficult to slot stats in. If any of you are interested on how to do so, just email me. I'm more than happy to guide you through.

At lunch, I got out to have a long lunch with younger co-workers here. Their choice is having pizza. It was well, except I somehow are going to loose my social skill. I found that going out to have lunch and maintain small talk is somewhat getting difficult as time passes. It took a lot of energy out of me for trying to be delighted & talkative during the 1.5 hr. lunch. I might spend time on my own for too long so I don't doing well when I have to be with my casual acquaintances. Do I need to pratice my social skill? I don't know... I just don't feel like I want to do so.

This makes me wonder what happens to me now. While I want to keep distance with people who are around in my life, but at the same time, I'm curious to know everything about people who just pass by to read my post! It's a big contradiction here, right? Why I want to chat with people that I have never known or seen before but want to avoid social occassion in my life? It was a while that I stop going out to friends' parties, wedding, dinners etc. and spend a lot of time try to communicate with people on cyber space. Have you ever feel the same that you find it's easier to speak your mind through writing but you feel uncomfortable to do the same with real person? I'm on Facebook and have some interactions with friends and have no intention to try to catch up with them in real life. I somehow pull myself out of Facebook social after people in real life start being there. I found myself stop writing about my feeling & my thoughts there.. What's wrong with me?

I think it's easier for me to share my thoughts and feeling to a total stranger through writing, because I don't have to worry if they will judge me. I might be afraid to get close to people in real life and let them see my weakness. Though I feel the feeling deep inside that I want to bond with other people, talk deeply about things, but I might never be able to do it in my real life. I remember the old days that I was enjoyed getting to know people from around the world through social web site like hi5, myspace etc. I was looking forward to hear from them everyday but again, there's no intention to meet at all. Today, I don't have that circle of friends anymore. There might be some kind of expiry date included with this type of connection. Because, at some point, those people just faded away from me with no reason. If any of them is here, they might scream from the other side of the world that they just get back to their lives!!! (which seems like I don't have it!)

Stay curious, folks!

Cutie Nicky!

Neo Blythe Nicky Lad (lacrada)
Originally uploaded by blythemix

Nicky Lad is July girl! She is so cute with her sporty short hair. I think she is the cutiest Blythe in 2010. Oh, no! Actually, Nostalgic Pop is unbelievable cute too. I plan to buy none of them. I think I have too much already.
Sounds like I'm hypnotizing myself, huh?

Justify my existence?

"You must all know half a dozen people at least who are no use in this world, who are more trouble than they are worth. Just put them there and say Sir, or Madam, now will you be kind enough to justify your existence? If you can’t justify your existence, if you’re not pulling your weight in the social boat, if you’re not producing as much as you consume or perhaps a little more, then, clearly, we cannot use the organizations of our society for the purpose of keeping you alive, because your life does not benefit us and it can’t be of very much use to yourself."

George Bernard Shaw


Speechless...


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What makes you smile...

Noah's Bento
Originally uploaded by pikkopots

I found this cute bento on Flicklr. I can't imagine who wouldn't have a smile for this cute. Sometimes we just need small little things to keep our lives going, just like touching of morning sun on delicated leafs of those little flowers.
Find yourself things that always keep you smile. It's the best vitamin for life!

Lesson from my 20s

"When we're young, we miss a great deal of the essential big picture in the blinding light of our dreams. When we're older, the big picture sometimes overshadows the light of those dreams"

I read the writing above from a web board somewhere and found it is the shortest way ever that you could possibly describe what life is. It makes me start thinking about how I see the world and react to what life offers me differently in my early 20s VS. now. What my priority at that time was chasing my dream, which it's all about career. I once believe that life is all about finding a way to do what you love and the rest will be just fine. I can't deny that it's not right, just see it differently. It's not 100% right anymore when you are older. "Life"... is not all about one thing. It's a mixture of various things in your life. "Success"... is not about being great in just one area of life.. The most successful person to me now is the one who find nice balance in life. There's no way in my 20s that I will define a stay-at-home mom or an easy-going-hippy as a successful person. But now, my view is changed. As long as you keep balance in every aspects your life well, then you deserve to be a sucess person.

I also once believed that you have all the power in the world to gear your life to the direction that you want, the most importantly, all mistakes in life are mendable. That's why there's a few times in life that I decided to do something that I have not think about it throughly before I did them. I've just found in my 30s that I have bonded with too few people. I lost many important friendships along the way in my life, which costs me deeply sad about it. Looking back to all my mistakes, this could be one of the area that I couldn't do much to fix it. Now I value relationships with people around me more than ever. I don't set my needs as the center of my little world anymore. In my 20s, I wouldn't do this because of the reason that I afraid doing so will make me feel like I lost my true self somehow. That kind of perception is another things that have been changed completely. Do I still spend a lot of time on my own? Yes.. But I learn to share those precious time with my love one too. "Happiness"... is not all about mine like the old days. Seeing my mom's smile, is a new true pleasure that I have never thought off before.

Anyway, it doesn't mean that I think what I did in my 20s is all wrong. It actually is a good ground of who I am today. Though there're so many times that I wonder how would my life today would be if I made different decisions in my past. As we all know, no one can not go back to correct your past. So it's not smart to stick yourself with guilts or live under shadow of those sorrows. What I can do now is aiming for the best possible things that I can do in my 30s. I wish to see myself having smile on my face in my 40s because all the good things I'm doing today.

And... It's all gone...

I was in the middle of writing my blog when I took off for my lunch. There's a little accident which made my writting all gone. It's only title left in the draft folder. I really want to cry... I will try to rewrite it but not so sure if it will be as fresh as the first draft... May be tomorrow... :-(




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I am the captain of my soul!

I am the master of my fate;
I am the captain of my soul.
~ William Ernest Henley (Invictus)

First of, I have to say, this is not a sad post.

Like other typical of my lazy Sunday night, I felt like I don't want to do anything, just lay down in front of TV with the remote control in my hand. Hours in front of TV and flipping through various channels seems to be the best way for me to kill time. I stopped at a Hallmark, which aired Oprah's show. The topic was not too interesting, just about somebody who lives her celebrity life. I didn't get much out of it except a moment that they mentioned about the phase above. It's touched me deeply, especially at the time I feel like I'm lost in nowhere. I'm in the moment that I don't know where I'm going to take my life to. It's totally different feeling, compares to how I feel ten years ago. Then, I could hardly wait for the the next day to come. Everyday has its own meaning. But what I have today? I just wake up at the time I should wake up, for no specific purpose. Do what I'm supposed to do to keep my routine runs. I do whatever I should to keep my job, so I will get my salary at the same time every month. And, for sure, so I can have enough money to pay bills, mortgage same time every month. Sometimes I wonder if it's what life is supposed to be. If it is, why should we be here at the first place. Are we here just to wait until our last day? Years of questioning, yet answer is found.

Back to the quote.. Like I said, it's touched. It's touched, not because I believe it's true. It's touched because I want to believe that it's true. Do you really believe that you are the master of your fate? In such this controversial economy? For sure, I believe I'm still the captain of soul but how much can I do when this soul is so weak. I think 10 years back, when my soul is fresh, if I hear this quote then, I would feel as if I can fly. World is so beautiful when your heart is full of hope. Now the same world is not the same to me anymore. Even I'm having the life that I was dreaming of when I was young. I have a job that I dreamed about. I have enough money to afford having my own house. I have convenience in life. But the strange is.. I feel even more struggle with my life.

I still do have dreams. It's just far more simpler than what I had when I first entered the real world. My perfect day is days that I'm free from social rules... The day that I don't have to go out for work. My job is fine. No one abuses me at the office, good pay at reasonalble hours required. But what makes me feel like I want to get out of it because it makes me feel like I loose my freedom somehow. I have to go to the office at certain hours on weekdays, same time in and same time out. I dream about days that I can do road trips to many places, stop whereever I want and on any day I want... I dream about days that I spend at home without the need to be under social obligations. That's the meaning of being master of my life...

Before I write this post, I googled for the quote. I found a very interesting post at http://justintadlock.com/archives/2007/03/23/the-captain-of-my-soul, which wrote by a fresh grats few years ago. Justin, the writer, mentioned about how he reacts with the transition in his life. He seems to struggle with finding answer for the meaning of life. I think he wrote it well especial when he said;

However, I do think some of this laziness stems from worry about the future. It’s like the world is finally letting go, saying, “I’m not holding your hand anymore, now spread your wings and fly…”

I wish after a few years has passed, he is now back on track. There're a lot of exciting things in life are waiting for a young like him. I don't know if I should wish for a day I will finally find a new challenge for myself. A day that I will find things that will help me feel the energy inside me again, things that will make me can't wait for the next day.  OR, should I wish to see myself admit and feel contented with my post-excitement phase of life. Sooner or later, I will surely have an answer for myself.

See, this is not a sad post at all.

In search of the new inspiration

I feel so weak during the past few months. There's nothing bad has happened. It's just how my mind fools around with myself. I think it's human nature that keep stiring your mind when life starts being in cliché. All you have to do is try to overcome that shit and convince yourself that you are still ok. Though sometimes it's a dark pleasure to let yourself drawn deep in self pity and feeling the weak side of you. But that's just like you are letting the devil eat you out. At the end you will find it more and more difficult to get back to be yourself again. Once you loose your strength to live, you will not know who you are anymore.

To rescue yourself out from that suck situation, you just have to get up and do something that you used to love. What works for me is music... I've just found it out this evening.. After music has been turned on, I started sing along with those familiar tunes... Then, the miracle begins. I feel much better! I know that it could help just in temporary but it's enough to give me a hope to get back to someone I want to see in myself again. It also gives me a will to continue searching for my next inspiration. I might still be under a bad weather, but I also a glismp of light at the end of the tunnel that I go toward to it. Life will not be too bad, unless you let it be.




Life is not perfectly beautiful... But as long as you keep painting it with some bright hopes, then it's not what you can not love it.

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Forest catching some rare rays

Forest catching some rare rays
Originally uploaded by Funny Bunny - Helena

She is too cute, isn't she? I'm falling in love with Ms. Gentle River but I think she is too pricey to adopt her. Now, what I can do is enjoying photos of her from other people.

What a nice lighting in this photo, huh??